Yeah, basically just an update on my life (in case anyone cares?
So you've probably noticed that I haven't been posting much art, yeah... Like I said before it's my senior year of college and I've got to graduate on time, so I'm just making sure I cover everything.... taking some very time-consuming classes right now.
Really questioning the thesis-making decision. Like, I felt flattered when my professors told me that they thought I would be a good student to work on a thesis. And graduating with honors sounds cool. But I still don't understand the fine art world at all, it seems so pretentious and arbitrary. Everything I produce for it is something I'm not really invested in, since I'm molding my art to please the faculty. I mean, all of my art experiences in college have been like this, but it's a shame that a personal thesis project has to be that way, too.
Socially my life is still a sad mess. I always imagined that by my senior year I'd have supportive friends at college and a place where I fit in, but I still don't. I never have anywhere to go or anything to do, or anyone to be with. Maybe it's a petty problem in the big scheme of things, but being lonely all the time and having no one to depend on is really hard for me. Especially around my favorite holiday. I never thought I'd go three years without anyone to be with on Halloween.
So yeah. Sometimes I'm thankful for my heavy workload, because it distracts me somewhat from loneliness and helps me justify having nothing to do. But man, I really hope things change some soon. Because I could go for like, a hug at least once every month...
</end another journal about being stressed and sad in college>
edit: I go to Wellesley College -- it's not an art school, art is just part of my major, media arts and sciences which is studio art / CS